Is a 'peeve' the same thing as a 'gripe'?

Many times on this site have I heard something described as a 'peeve'. My sense is that this is American.

Although the verb, usually in the passive - he was peeved because he had been given the wrong change, and refused to visit the shop again - exists in Britain, I have seldom heard it used as a noun.

The usual term in Britain I would have said was a 'gripe'. Is a 'peeve' the same thing as a 'gripe'?

Nonetheless I think both expressions are over-the-top for the examples which sometimes appear here. I would tend to call most of them 'pet dislikes'. I think 'peeve' or 'gripe' places too strong a negative sense upon them. A normal healthy mind has likes and dislikes. Dislikes do not have to be justified. In most English-speaking lands people are free to state their preferences.

Solution 1:

John Lawler illustrates peeve nicely. Per his comment:

A peeve is a frequently-felt irritation. Many people cherish them, whence the phrase my pet peeve. In the context of language use, a peeve refers to a habit of others' speech (never of one's own speech) that someone finds irritating. Such habits are always incorrectly perceived (see "zombie rules"), but that never seems to assuage the peeve itself, which is lovingly trotted out at every opportunity.

Dictionary.com suggests that it is an American backformation from peevish. Merriam-Webster suggests nark as a British synonym for peeve, but I can't attest to that.

On the other hand, a gripe is a grumbling complaint. Dictionary.com shows that this is a much older word. Gripe is not particular to British or American English.

These two things are not the same, but they are related. A person may enjoy griping about their favored peeve, for instance. In that case, peeving and griping can overlap. However, peeving can also encompass raging, ranting, eye rolling, snarking, and some types of trolling like flamebaiting. None of these behaviors would be considered griping.

FumbleFingers adds the very important note that peeving includes an implied appeal to authority, whereas griping does not. For instance:

It should be 'ten items or fewer'. That's the rule!

is peeving. Compare this with:

They put the sign in the middle of the aisle, and I crashed right into it. I'm always crashing into things at that store. It's like they don't know how to lay out traffic patterns.

is more like griping.