Disdainful pity...?

Solution 1:

The word you are actually looking for is (drumbeats) pity.

The word pity, of late, has become associated with being condescending. When you take pity on a person, you implicitly regard him as inferior and feckless. The words sympathy and compassion, on the other hand, do not have such negativity attached to them.

References:

• "Pity has the dynamic that the one to whom it is shown is considered not only in a worse situation than the one who shows pity, but also considered inferior." (Newint)
• Wikipedia
• In English, people have started to avoid the word pity, because it has come to have associations of superiority. (See the note in this link.)

Solution 2:

You could be looking for a word like contempt in the sense of 'looking-down' at someone (disdain, as you say).

Though this is not the same as 'pity', it is 'pity' itself that has acquired such connotations of disdain of late.