"Why aren't you listening to me?" versus "Why don't you listen to me?"

Solution 1:

The present progressive construction is typically used to refer to an event occurring at the time of speaking. The present tense is typically used to refer to something which is generally the case. Why aren't you listening to me? asks why the person addressed isn’t listening to what the speaker is saying now. Why don't you listen to me? asks a question about the habitual inattention of the person addressed.

That, at least, is the general position, but English verb forms are sensitive to the situation and context in which they are used, and the choice between the two in your example would depend on the relationship between the two speakers and on what has gone on previously in the conversation.