Referring to my husband as my son's dad?
I received an invitation for a session at my son's (John) school. The teacher had asked us to confirm our attendance for the event. I wrote the following
John's Dad and I will be attending the session.
(And signed my name below the note).
Is this usage correct? Does it in any way imply that we are not living together?
While there's technically an ambiguity, I think that the general assumption made by the reader will be that you are John's mother and nothing more. Based on this single statement, I don't think that the reader is going to be led to believe that you are separated from your husband/John's father. It is also quite common—in PTA meetings and such—to refer to the husband (who is often absent) as <name>'s father.
(The ambiguity does not necessarily only indicate that you might not be living together with John's father. It could also imply that you are not his mother. Moreover, even if your family name matches that of John, it could well be that you are his sister, grandmother or aunt. I expect that the easiest way to avoid this situation altogether would be to reply with something along the lines of, "Yes, we will be attending this session", and "sign" underneath as, "Mr. and Mrs. Doe", if necessary.)
The usage is correct. It also makes clear that the person who is the father figure in John's life currently will participate.
It does not imply living, marital or birth arrangements for you or John's dad. The adult to whom you are referring
- may or may not live with you
- may or may not live with John
- may or may not be married to you
- may or may not be John's biological father
- may or may not have legal guardianship or custody of John
Regardless of which combinations of the options listed above apply, the a male person who has a parental role in John's life will be present. That is probably what the school is most interested in.
That being said, people make all sorts of assumptions about marital status, living arrangements, parental history and so forth, based on their world view, not necessarily based on your communication. That is their problem, not yours.
You are right.
There's nothing to imply what is not patently stated in the sentence. Any interpretations drawn by the reader are not just subjective but unwarranted, in the context.