Can I say "how eager" and "awaits me"?

The fish used to bawl when I left, and the chicken would tell me how eager the fish awaited me.

Disregard the chickens and fish, I just needed something tangible.

ABC is sad when I go; XYZ tells me how eager ABC awaits me.

or

ABC...; XYZ tells me how eagerly ABC awaits me.

I'm trying to push that ABC was excited to see me, and that XYZ would tell me that.

Can I saw "how eager" or is that awkward? Does "awaits me" work or is that awkward? Does it convey ABC's excitement? If not, any advice or better ways to phrase?


Solution 1:

The fish used to bawl when I left, and the chicken would tell me how eager the fish awaited me.

"awaited me" is acceptable but I would prefer "awaited my return."

"eager "should be "eagerly"

The fish used to bawl when I left, and the chicken would tell me how eagerly the fish awaited my return.