On the one hand ... on the other

Solution 1:

If you wanted to be more clear, you could rephrase with:

Drawing an equivalence between the torture, false imprisonment, and rape of real slavery and the consensual sexual kink of the BDSM same-named version is...

The "on one hand/on the other hand" phrasing isn't really necessary, but if that's your preferred style then your existing usage looks fine to me.

Though I would use "from" instead of "to" in the prior sentence ;-p

Solution 2:

Two possible ways to fix this without changing the structure would be to use a semicolon, or to place the commas differently:

  1. Drawing an equivalence between torture, false imprisonment, and rape on the one hand; and a sexual kink on the other is highly insulting.

  2. Drawing an equivalence between torture, false imprisonment and rape on the one hand, and a sexual kink on the other is highly insulting.

Personally, I would go with the second option.

On a somewhat related note, this reminds me of the Language Log entry "When commas are crucial to comprehension".