A word for fake sympathy?
Solution 1:
For fake sympathy I'd suggest "Crocodile tears"
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crocodile_tears Wikipedia Crocodile tears (or superficial sympathy) are a false, insincere display of emotion such as a hypocrite crying fake tears of grief. The phrase derives from an ancient belief that crocodiles shed tears while consuming their victims.
For meaning the opposite of what one is saying: "ironic"
Irony | Define Irony at Dictionary.com dictionary.reference.com/browse/irony Dictionary.com Irony definition, the use of words to convey a meaning that is the opposite of its literal meaning: the irony of her reply, “How nice!” when I said I had to work all weekend.
Solution 2:
Is the word you're looking for 'patronizing'?