How to configure WebDeploy server for direct publishing from visual studio?

Ah, Anton from the comments section of the post says "For those who are missing the configuration option in IIS make sure you’ve installed the “Web Deploy 3.0 for Hosting Servers” – You can search for it in the Web PI tool."

And indeed there is such an option in the Web Platform Installer search, now updated for WebDeploy version 3.5

Then, you use IIS's "Management Service" panel at the server level to configure the (stopped) service to select the correct certificate for the host name you'll be accessing it by and to allow remote access.

Then, in Visual Studio 2013, use HTTP rather than the https that you might think to use. Apparently 2013 uses a different protocol. I forget where I read that.