Substitute for F*** in emphasizing disbelief, anger, etc

How do I replace F*** while expressing fully my disbelief, anger, etc?

E.g.,

"I think Homer Simpson is incredibly sexy"

My reply "Get out of here! That's f***ing ridiculous."

Solution 1:

Well, the most obvious choice would be freaking or effing.

Solution 2:

Besides RegDwight’s excellent suggestions, flaming and frigging are both widely used (respectively more common in the UK and US, I think).

In my family, when I was small, my father would always say “That’s ff… frankly ridiculous,” and so on — going completely over my head at the time, and much to the amusement of the adults around. “Shiver me timbers!” was another favourite exclamation of his, for similar reasons…

It’s easy to vary the subtlety/blatantness of these, and hence to sound completely innocuous to outsiders while ensuring that your friends know what you’re really thinking :-)