What do you call a person who refuses the love of another?
In terms of courtly love, you have:
- The lover (person in love)
- The beloved (object of the lover's affection)
- The courtier (the pursuer of the beloved; alt. term for a lover)
The lover or courtier would pursue the beloved, who would appear chaste in public but secretly swoon over the lover, and the two would profess their love in private. Most texts on courtly love also refer to the person "who scorns the lover's advances", but don't give this person (usually a woman) a title.
I am looking for a word that fits in this nomenclature to refer to this person (man or woman):
the scorner of the lover's love.
The word that I'm using is "shrew", but that doesn't quite fit the gender neutral requirement. As well, a shrew is just a bad-tempered woman, not necessarily someone who scorns love. I don't like "scold" for the same reason.
What word could fit in this sentence:
His love wants a living kiss, but she is a _______ who will never requite.
I am happy with a neologism if it fits.
Solution 1:
The non-requiter. See definition of requite:
verb [with object] formal
- make appropriate return for (a favor, service, or wrongdoing): they are quick to requite a kindness
- return a favor to (someone): to win enough to requite my friends
- respond to (love or affection); return: she did not requite his love
Solution 2:
If you are willing to accept neologisms how about...
Non-committer, a person who fails to commit him or herself to another person. From the verb, commit = To pledge or obligate one's own self: She felt that she was too young to commit fully to marriage.
Decliner could be used for a person who refuses a marriage proposal or the manifestations of affection and love from somebody. (This word actually exists) From the verb, decline to withhold consent
Deamorer a person who hesitates to accept an offer of love
From Latin amare to love; dēmorārī "to loiter, linger," from morārī "to delay", from mora "a pause, a delay"
Solution 3:
If you want a word to describe matters of doomed love, I think Thomas Hardy has your needs covered. To wit, his poem "He Abjures Love": To abjure is to renounce.
The noun form would be abjurer (or "abjuror"). If you want a word that specifically describes a woman, it could be written as:
His love wants a living kiss, but she is an abjuress who will never requite.
If you want something more gender-neutral:
His love wants a living kiss, but she is an abjurer who will never requite.
Solution 4:
Perhaps spurner
a person who rejects (a person or thing) with contempt
It is not clear whether your concept includes the contempt aspect of this term, but many a rejected lover feels contempt, even if the object of affection intends none.
Solution 5:
How about Jilter
It does seem to be a noun
Spurner can be found too, but I have more problems with that than a jilter